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Are YOU in FUNK CITY?
PEEPS, DUDIES, and HOMIES in a FUNK! Click Here for Dweeb Stuff!

Get to FUN CITY in a FLASH!
PEEPS, DUDES, and HOMIES in FUN CITY. Click for the Most Groovy Slag!

Take the FUNK e-RACERtm for a Joy Ride!


Catch the FUNK e-RACER(tm)! Ride the FUNK e-RACER(tm)!


Go from

FUNK CITY TO

FUN CITY

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Want to get out of a funk fast? Use the Funky Racer! With the Funkee Racer, you can go from Funk City to Fun City faster than you can download a new tune for your MP3 player.

What? You don’t know how to drive the Funkie Racer?

Dude! It’s simple: you just have to say few sentences.
Suppose you’re 17-years-old and in a FUNK. C'mon, admit it. You wanta grad? Junk the funk! If you're not 17, just start at the age you are and add or take away a few sentences below.

Here's how you start:
You climb into the Funkie Racer by saying aloud (or to yourself — if you’re hanging with your homies):

“I’m 17 and I got this funk.” and you start going down the Funky Race Track to the Finish Line which is where your Funk will disappear. In other words, get the funk out of here – get the funk out of you – which is what we call reaching the Finish Line. The Finish Line --- You know, Dudes and Dudettes, it's when yo' FUNK is Finished!

You say:
“I’m 14 and I got this funk.”

Then:
“I’m 10 and I got this funk.”

And:
“I’m 7 and I got this funk.”

Finally:
“I’m 5 and I got this funk.”

Now --- you getting close to the Finish Line --- shift your Funk e-Racer into High Gear:

Say this:
“I’m 4, have I got the funk out of here yet?”

If the funk is gone, you’re done, Dude! Fun City time! Now ask yourself the Funky Question:
“What funky thing gave me that funk at 4 years old?”

If you still got the funk, continue on down:

Say:
“I’m 3, have I got the funk out of here?”

If the funk is gone, you’re done, Dude! Now ask yourself the Funky Question:
“What funky thing gave me that funk at 3 years old?”

Say:
“I’m 2, have I got the funk out of here?”

No funk now? You’re done, Dude! Now ask yourself the Funky Question: “What funky thing gave me that funk at 2 years old?”

Say:
“I’m 1 year old, have I got the funk out of here?”

If the funk is gone, you’re done, Dude! Now ask yourself the Funky Question: “What funky thing gave me that funk at 1 year old?”

Say:
“I’m 9 months old, have I got the funk out of here?”

If the funk is gone, you’re done, Dude! Now ask yourself the Funky Question: “What funky thing gave me that funk at 9 months old?”

Say:
“I’m 6 months old, have I got the funk out of here?”

If the funk is gone, you’re done, Dude! Now ask yourself the Funky Question: “What funky thing gave me that funk at 6 months old?”

Say:
“I’m 3 months old, have I got the funk out of here?”

If the funk is gone, you’re done, Dude! Now ask yourself the Funky Question: “What funky thing gave me that funk at 3 months old?”

Say:
“I’m 2 months old, have I got the funk out of here?”

If the funk is gone, you’re done, Dude! Now ask yourself the Funky Question: “What funky thing happened to me at 4 years old that gave me that funk that just left?”

Say:
“I’m one month old, have I got the funk out of here?”

If the funk is gone, you’re done, Dude! Now ask yourself the Funky Question: “What funky thing gave me that funk at one month old?”

Say:
“I’m one day old, have I got the funk of here?”

If you still got the funk, go to before you were born by saying the stuff below. If the funk goes away, ask yourself the Funky Question. “What funky thing gave me that funk at 9 months old?”

Keep that funky music going right on down till you reach the Finish Line!

“I’m one day before my birth, have I got the funk out of here?”
“I’m one month before my birth, have I got the funk out of here?”
“I’m two months before my birth, have I got the funk out of here?”
“I’m three months before my birth, have I got the funk out of here?”
“I’m four months before my birth, have I got the funk out of here?”
“I’m five months before my birth, have I got the funk out of here?”
“I’m six months before my birth, have I got the funk out of here?”
“I’m seven months before my birth, have I got the funk out of here?”

Seven months before birth is the first time it is possible, Dude and Dudettes, to get into a funk of any kind. If the funk is still there, you got two things you can do:

1) Start over at the beginning and go faster. Hit the pedal to the metal and make your Funkee Racer fly! The faster you go, the easiest it is to stay on the track and reach the Finish Line!

2) Put your Funkee Racer in the garage and give it a rest. If that same funk grabs you later, get back in the Funkee Racer and go for the Finish Line this time. Sometimes funks are due to something you ate and once that food has been completely digested, your funk will disappear. Avoid such foods that give you funks that your Funk e-Racer cannot get to the Finish Line with.


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